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January 23, 2009

January 23, 2009 - The "Silver Sedan"

         Today I was given a real treat.

         Today I was lucky enough to drive one of the company's "Silver Shuttle" cabs.  Some might say - "What's so special about those, they look like all of the company's other death traps out there on the road."

Au contraire!

       Here at Cortez Cab, Catherine has the idea that people want to be pampered, to ride in style - in luxury if you will.  Well people, we have an answer!  We have our opulent Silver Shuttle cabs where you too can be treated like royalty.  I think it should be called "Sliver Shuttle" or "Tetanus Taxi". The rate is the same, but the drivers are required to wear a tie - which they seldom do.  The theory is that the cabs are much nicer.  All I want to know is if these are the company's fancy cabs, what would you expect from the standard ones.  Oh yeah, I'll be sure to wear a tie, as soon as I see my plumber come over wearing a tuxedo.


Boy, those rusty steel springs coming out the seat accentuate the moldy blue vinyl seats.


And the window, well, that's quite nice too.  I never though that I would come to appreciate an opaque window but it's quite nice really.  And if I want to roll it down I can just remove the pen that is wedging it into place and it can fall into the door.


This is lovely.  Along with a drug test the company should require a Tetanus shot.  I'm not quite sure what the chunk of foam is for.  Perhaps to soak up all the slime that has collected in the cup-holder.


Hex bolts, perfect!  Why use flimsy finely threaded screws when you can use sturdy, durable, rust-proof, galvanized hex bolts.  Ingenious!


Now we have the seats, with their rustic old world charm.  Aged to perfection.  It's a shame, they appear to be splitting at the side.  Surely there is a roll of duct tape, or the ubiquitous checkered tape that the office is so fond of.  I never realized how versatile it was.


 How cute, the carpeting on the floorboard has become so rotten and saturated with mystery fluids that has deteriorated to the point where the fiberglass floorboard has began to show through.


I often see this of cars that have been sitting in the desert sun for years.


More mystery stains on the seats.  In the rip on the side you could hide valuables right behind the exposed metal frame of the seat and grimy yellow foam.

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