July 5, 2008 – Getting Kirk Excited

            Today someone was getting Kirk all excited again.  This seems to happen at least once a week.  Sometimes more.

            The reason that no one likes Kirk is because he’s an a-hole.   There was a new guy that started last week and tried to introduce himself.  He walked up to Kirk’s window.  Kirk just ignored him.  He didn’t even flinch.  Jack (the new driver) was in disbelief.

            Jack: I tried to talk to cab 83 (Kirk) earlier and he didn’t say anything.           

            Me: Yeah, that’s Kirk alright.  I wouldn’t bother with that guy.  Nobody here likes him.

            Jack: He didn’t even acknowledge me.  I know he heard me, his window was open.

            Me: Don’t worry, he’s like that to everyone.  He’s crazy, none of us like him.

            Jack: Thanks for letting me know.

            So anyways, like clockwork, one of the drivers began to pick on Kirk.  This usually happens when he comes into work for the day.

            Kirk: Cab 83

            Julie: Cab 83

            Kirk: 10-8, 10-30 (Back in service, send me an assignment)

            Julie: Go to the Vo-----(Click, Click, Click) and pic-------- (Click, Click, Click)

            Kirk: 10-9 (Repeat)

            Julie: Go to th---(Click, Click) and pick u---(Click, Click, Click, Click)

            Kirk: 10-9!

            Julie: Go to th----(Click, Click, Click, Click, Click…)

            Kirk: Some queers playing with the radio again.

            Julie: What’s wrong with you!


            The sad thing about Julie's question is that it wasn't directed at Kirk...  In her eyes Kirk wasn't the problem.

            I was sitting with another driver when this was all happening, waiting for a fare.  We both got a chuckle.  Calling people “queers” is a favorite past time of Kirk’s.  It’s his favorite insult for sure.  Other insults include calling people “Princess,” “Raghead,” “Asshole,” “Coward,” “Their highness” or  “Sissy white people” - just to name a few.  All of our customers and fellow drivers get to hear this as well because it is broadcast throughout our radio network.  This is all ok in Catherine’s eyes since Kurt is a “good worker” because he works 12-hour days EVERY day of the year.  A sociopath, but a “good worker” nevertheless.  But boy, if I forget to wear my black pants, well then, that’s a disaster.

You all remember Kirk right?  

June 12, 2008 – Our Mechanic Stanley

Before me with a not so bright look on his face stands our mechanic Stanley cackling away.  I can’t help but stare at the three metal screws sticking out of his upper jaw.  There are no teeth, just the three metal spikes that likely held them at some point.  Man, meth must be a hell of a drug…  He thinks that the company is a big pile of crap as well so we have something in common.

I don't have a picture of "Stanley", but this is what he'd look like with a beard...

Nice guy when he isn’t stealing our gas and causing us to lose time at work from the new parts that Catherine buys, when she actually decides to buy new parts, and replacing them with old.   Sometimes the parts he puts in are broken to begin with. 

One of our drivers, Jefferson, was having issues with the battery in his taxi.  Jefferson came to the determination that it needed a new battery.  He took the time to bring his taxi to the shop and that did whatever it is that they do there and replaced the battery, or so he was led to believe…  The problem kept occurring and Jefferson kept bringing the taxi to the shop for battery related problems.  On the fourth trip Jefferson was pretty irritated and asked Stanley personally about the problem.  It was at this juncture that Stanley simply giggled and nonchalantly admitted that he had never changed the battery.

What Stanley had been doing was merely washing the battery to make it appear to new, while doing who knows what with the new batteries, and telling Catherine that the car had been fixed.  I’m willing to bet that he was selling them and keeping the money, while Jefferson was getting screwed out of time at work that he could have been making money, not to mention the frustration of dealing with the office.

Then there’s the side business of stealing gas.  It’s fairly obvious, one of the other mechanics even volunteered that he saw Stanley doing this first hand.  Not too long ago I brought my taxi into the shop for a repair.  I brought it in with a full tank of gas.  When I got my cab back there was only  two thirds of a tank left.  So I called the office.

Me: Hi Catherine, I picked up my car from the shop yesterday and it was short of gas.  I’ll go ahead and submit a receipt for the shortage when I pay my lease.

Catherine: *****, when we fix something on a car we take it for a test drive to make sure it has been fixed.

Me: $27 worth?  Where did he test drive it to?

Catherine: Ok *****, I’ll credit you this time.

What a sweetheart.  I guess it would be too much to admit that her mechanic is stealing our gas by siphoning it out of our cars.  I’m not the only driver who has complained about this by the way.   Surely if I made a direct accusation Catherine would want some concrete proof like video evidence or something.  I mean why fix problems when you can just deny them right?  That seems to be the trend.

In addition to selling parts and stealing gas. Stanley makes his money selling  shitty weed, he has a big jar that he keeps it in over at the shop.  I’d never buy weed from Stanley, actually I’d be reluctant to buy anything that he has had his grubby hands on.  Apparently this isn’t enough to pay his debtors though.

A few days ago a few large men came to the office and had a word with Stanley off in the distance.  I wasn’t there that day but Jefferson saw the whole thing.  Stanley was just getting SCREAMED AT!

Jefferson: What was that about?

Stanley: I owe those guys some money.  It’s been a bit and they’re not happy.

Jefferson: How much do you owe them?

Stanley: $200

Jefferson: That sounds bad.  Here’s $200.  You can pay me back next week.

Stanley: Thanks so much Jefferson.

Jefferson’s a stand up guy.  It pains me to see people like Jefferson working here.  Someone with so much potential.  Why am I still here anyways?  I can’t stand these clowns.  I actually got offered a job with the government a while back, but the pay was shit.  Here I stand, the master of reflection.  So many questions…

Who knows what would have happened to Stanley if he didn’t pay those men.  Although, if he isn’t able to pay two large angry men, I don’t know what the chances of him paying Jefferson back are…